I’m heading out on vacation in an hour, so I’m posting this week’s blog a little early…
Last week, I mentioned that one of my worries is that someday a bully might try to harm my son by smearing peanut butter on him in school. That’s not a worry I just made up. Just a few weeks ago, a teen student in Kentucky was charged with a felony after putting peanut butter cookie crumbs into another student’s lunch box with the intent to harm him.
In other cases, children have actually smeared peanut butter on allergic kids, threatened to smear them, or threatened to force peanut products into their mouths. A couple of years ago, a student threatened to hold his teacher down and force a Nutter Butter down her throat.
It’s not that these bullies are worse than other bullies. It’s simply that they’ve found a new addition to the typical bully arsenal of physical and emotional weapons. (See this article from Canada, for examples of this bold new world of bullyism.)
The blog world is a-buzz with this latest cookie crumb case and other stories like it. Here are just a few interesting posts worth checking out, including one from Rush Limbaugh. (Yes, every once in a while, planets align in mysterious ways, and in this particular case, Rush and I actually agree on something.)
MomLogic (a mom talks about how both of her allergic kids have been "peanut bullied" at school)
Peanut Free Mama (readers comment on whether they think the felony charge is too harsh)
Rush Limbaugh (Transcript of a phone call where he responds to a woman asking his opinion of the “craziness of the nut allergy people)
Kids Food Allergies Blog (a parent discusses the contrast between Rush Limbaugh’s take and the patently absurd Harper’s article which tries to dismiss peanut allergies as a national hysteria instead of a medical reality – which makes me so angry I can’t talk about it right now… stay tuned for a future blog entry on that)
It’s easy to get emotional about bullying. It’s an age-old problem, and one that will never go away, because human beings are human beings, and that means someone will always be trying to find ways to feel powerful over someone else. It’s unfortunate that they’ve found a new weapon, but it isn’t surprising. Bullies can be just as creative as the next guy. Too bad they can’t channel their ambitions in a more positive manner.
This does mean that we, as parents of allergic kids, have one more thing to teach our children about when it comes to facing bullies in the school. Same problem, different variation. But we can do it, and our kids are strong.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Monday, May 26, 2008
Do I Worry? Duh!
Natalie Williams, a pediatric psychology resident at the University of Mississippi Medical Center, is conducting an Internet-based survey to learn more about the challenges faced by parents of children with food allergies. The survey asks questions about parenting issues, parent worries and concerns, and child emotions and behaviors. She’s asking everyone who is a primary caregiver of a food-allergic child to take her survey so she can help develop the body of knowledge about how food allergies affect the daily lives of children and their parents. (Do take the survey. It’s here.)
I just participated in the survey, and it was interesting to see the types of questions being asked. Sometimes, however, I wasn’t sure how to answer a question. For example, I was supposed to indicate if “I worry about my child’s future,” and the choices were “Never,” “Sometimes,” and “Often.”
The thing is, I do worry about my child’s future, but not usually in relation with his food allergies. I worry about his ability to control his rambunctious, high-energy, emotional approach to life so that he fits in a little better with his colleagues when he enters the workforce. I worry that he’ll inherit a world polluted beyond the limits of human health. I worry that he’ll lose his fascination with science and sports and end up being sucked into the black hole of video games when I no longer have control of his schedule. I worry that a girl will break his heart. I worry that he’ll be lured in by drugs. I worry that he’ll be lured in by a religious cult. I worry that he’ll be lured in by a traveling circus.
I look at the world he’s growing up in, and I am wracked with concern that the America I love is becoming the laughing-stock of the world because we’ve lost sight of some fundamental human values like acceptance, charity, education, and support, and replaced them with political charades like intolerance, greed, territorialism, and prejudice. I worry that we’ve become a society more interested in which big-bosomed gold-digger marries the jerk on some reality TV show than in whether or not the majority of Americans can afford basic health care. I worry that I’ll be hit by a bus and won’t be there to help guide him to adulthood. I worry that he’ll get his feelings hurt at school.
I worry that he won’t be able to get a scholarship to college, and that the amount of money I have managed to save for his college so far won’t buy him a venti latte at Starbucks when he finally gets to campus. I worry that he won’t make the high school soccer team, even though he’s only in third grade right now. I worry that the city of Venice may sink into the sea before the dollar strengthens enough so that I can take my son there to see it. I worry that he’ll get nibbled by a barracuda the next time he goes snorkeling. I worry that his hormones are about to kick in, and I’m not going to be a patient enough mom to handle that. I worry that he’ll want to buy a motorcycle someday.
And yes, I worry that he’ll eat something with nuts in it someday and have a bad reaction before help arrives. I worry that before too long, he’ll be out of my reach, and traveling through hazelnut-infested countries without me. I worry that he’ll kiss a girl who’s eaten a peanut butter cookie. I worry that his kids might someday have even worse food allergies than him. I worry that he’ll make a student mad at school someday, and that kid will smear peanut butter on him to get even. Of course, I also worry that the angry kid will skip the peanut butter smearing and just haul off and paste my son with a mean left hook. Kids find ways to hurt each other, and the weapons change to suit the moment.
So there are a lot of reasons why I worry about his future. Only some of them are food-allergy related. Most of them are typical parent worries, and I think most parents lie awake at night dreaming up disasters we have no business dreaming up. My dad said his grandmother used to lie awake at night worrying that someday her husband might want to move the family to a ranch with an open cow tank, and maybe her kid would fall into it and drown. She would worry about this, even though they weren’t moving and had no plans to move. And I thought I worried unnecessarily.
It will be interesting to see the results of this survey. I wonder if we food-allergy parents really worry more than other parents, or if we all worry the same amount and just have a few variations based on our own particular circumstances.
I wish I didn’t worry quite so much. But when they handed me that adorable little caterwauling bundle of joy at the hospital nine and a half years ago, the doctor said, “Congratulations, it’s a boy. And along with him, here’s your bag of worries, your box of obsessions, your knapsack of fears, and your suitcase of paranoia. Enjoy him!”
And I do enjoy him, despite all the worries. He’s worth every moment of it.
I just participated in the survey, and it was interesting to see the types of questions being asked. Sometimes, however, I wasn’t sure how to answer a question. For example, I was supposed to indicate if “I worry about my child’s future,” and the choices were “Never,” “Sometimes,” and “Often.”
The thing is, I do worry about my child’s future, but not usually in relation with his food allergies. I worry about his ability to control his rambunctious, high-energy, emotional approach to life so that he fits in a little better with his colleagues when he enters the workforce. I worry that he’ll inherit a world polluted beyond the limits of human health. I worry that he’ll lose his fascination with science and sports and end up being sucked into the black hole of video games when I no longer have control of his schedule. I worry that a girl will break his heart. I worry that he’ll be lured in by drugs. I worry that he’ll be lured in by a religious cult. I worry that he’ll be lured in by a traveling circus.
I look at the world he’s growing up in, and I am wracked with concern that the America I love is becoming the laughing-stock of the world because we’ve lost sight of some fundamental human values like acceptance, charity, education, and support, and replaced them with political charades like intolerance, greed, territorialism, and prejudice. I worry that we’ve become a society more interested in which big-bosomed gold-digger marries the jerk on some reality TV show than in whether or not the majority of Americans can afford basic health care. I worry that I’ll be hit by a bus and won’t be there to help guide him to adulthood. I worry that he’ll get his feelings hurt at school.
I worry that he won’t be able to get a scholarship to college, and that the amount of money I have managed to save for his college so far won’t buy him a venti latte at Starbucks when he finally gets to campus. I worry that he won’t make the high school soccer team, even though he’s only in third grade right now. I worry that the city of Venice may sink into the sea before the dollar strengthens enough so that I can take my son there to see it. I worry that he’ll get nibbled by a barracuda the next time he goes snorkeling. I worry that his hormones are about to kick in, and I’m not going to be a patient enough mom to handle that. I worry that he’ll want to buy a motorcycle someday.
And yes, I worry that he’ll eat something with nuts in it someday and have a bad reaction before help arrives. I worry that before too long, he’ll be out of my reach, and traveling through hazelnut-infested countries without me. I worry that he’ll kiss a girl who’s eaten a peanut butter cookie. I worry that his kids might someday have even worse food allergies than him. I worry that he’ll make a student mad at school someday, and that kid will smear peanut butter on him to get even. Of course, I also worry that the angry kid will skip the peanut butter smearing and just haul off and paste my son with a mean left hook. Kids find ways to hurt each other, and the weapons change to suit the moment.
So there are a lot of reasons why I worry about his future. Only some of them are food-allergy related. Most of them are typical parent worries, and I think most parents lie awake at night dreaming up disasters we have no business dreaming up. My dad said his grandmother used to lie awake at night worrying that someday her husband might want to move the family to a ranch with an open cow tank, and maybe her kid would fall into it and drown. She would worry about this, even though they weren’t moving and had no plans to move. And I thought I worried unnecessarily.
It will be interesting to see the results of this survey. I wonder if we food-allergy parents really worry more than other parents, or if we all worry the same amount and just have a few variations based on our own particular circumstances.
I wish I didn’t worry quite so much. But when they handed me that adorable little caterwauling bundle of joy at the hospital nine and a half years ago, the doctor said, “Congratulations, it’s a boy. And along with him, here’s your bag of worries, your box of obsessions, your knapsack of fears, and your suitcase of paranoia. Enjoy him!”
And I do enjoy him, despite all the worries. He’s worth every moment of it.
Monday, May 19, 2008
Getting Creative with School Substitutions
Last night, I was up ‘til midnight making chocolate bars. My son’s science teacher decided that since it was finally going to be sunny today (is spring finally here?), she wanted to make solar-powered mini ovens and let the kids make Solar S’mores. So she asked my friend Kim (mother of my son’s best friend) if she could get safe supplies. Kim handled the graham crackers and marshmallows, and I handled the chocolate bars.
Fortunately, Hershey’s developed a recipe for their Special Dark Chocolate Bark for people who are allergic to milk. We’ve made it and used it before in S’mores, and it works wonderfully. (See below for the recipe.)
At the beginning of every school year, Kim and I tell the teachers that we can find safe substitutes (milk-, egg-, and nut-free) for just about anything they ever need for any classroom activity, treat, project, or celebration. Most of the time, the substitutions are pretty easy – to make gingerbread houses, we used safe graham crackers, safe frosting, safe gumdrops, and other safe candies. You want to have hot dogs? We can find safe hot dogs and buns. Candy for a candy cannon? We’re all over that, with Starbursts and Skittles. Need safe paella for the third grade program – just use chicken instead of crab, and Swanson’s chicken broth instead of bullion cubes, and we’re good to go!
Every once in a while, we get to really stretch our creativity. A couple of weeks ago, a teacher asked us what to use instead of taffy to demonstrate metamorphic rocks. You should have been listening to the phone conversation between me and Kim. “Well, what exactly will the kids be doing to show metamorphic rock? Are they compressing it under heat? Are they changing its form from granular to crystal? Are they stretching it or folding it? Are they showing layers or texture?” We sounded pretty darn scientific. And we probably over-thought it, by a long shot.
But we came up with a bunch of different ideas for the teacher, from the putty you use to stick posters to the wall, to marshmallows, to slime. It turns out she just wanted the kids to stretch the stuff, so she went with our idea that most resembled her original request of taffy – Airheads candy.
We’re proud to say that in 4 years of school, we’ve yet to be stumped by a teacher’s request. When we can, we try to steer the teachers away from food products at all (instead of piñata candy, I found small toys and some old Mexican coins that the kids loved), just because we want to see less candy in schools as a general rule that has little to do with food allergies and more to do with healthy overall eating habits. But when food is really called for, we can supply that, too.
Sometimes it feels like a hassle, but it’s worth it to keep our kids (and other allergic kids) safe, and worth it to teach the teachers that there really are safe substitutions for all their favorite classroom activities.
And I have to admit, it’s kind of fun to be challenged to think in new ways. There’s something refreshingly creative about spending a few minutes brainstorming crazy ideas about what metamorphic rocks and Airheads have in common.
By the way, here is the recipe for the chocolate bark, from Hershey’s and the Food Allergy & Anaphylaxis Network (FAAN):
Hershey’s Special Dark Bark
Milk-free, Egg-free, Wheat-free, Peanut-free, Soy-free, Nut-free
1 (8-oz.) package of Hershey’s Unsweetened Baking Chocolate, broken into pieces
1/4 cup plus 1 tsp. shortening
1/8 tsp. vanilla extract
2 cups confectioners sugar
Grease 9x9-inch pan. Set aside. In medium bowl, microwave chocolate and shortening on high for 1 1/2 to 2 minutes, until mixture is melted and smooth when stirred. Add vanilla extract. Gradually stir in sugar. If mixture becomes too thick, knead with clean hands. Spread out in prepared pan. Cover tightly. Refrigerate until firm. Break into pieces. Store, well covered, in refrigerator.
Note: After changing the formulation on its Special Dark chocolate bar to include milk, Hershey’s developed this recipe for milk-allergic consumers.
Fortunately, Hershey’s developed a recipe for their Special Dark Chocolate Bark for people who are allergic to milk. We’ve made it and used it before in S’mores, and it works wonderfully. (See below for the recipe.)
At the beginning of every school year, Kim and I tell the teachers that we can find safe substitutes (milk-, egg-, and nut-free) for just about anything they ever need for any classroom activity, treat, project, or celebration. Most of the time, the substitutions are pretty easy – to make gingerbread houses, we used safe graham crackers, safe frosting, safe gumdrops, and other safe candies. You want to have hot dogs? We can find safe hot dogs and buns. Candy for a candy cannon? We’re all over that, with Starbursts and Skittles. Need safe paella for the third grade program – just use chicken instead of crab, and Swanson’s chicken broth instead of bullion cubes, and we’re good to go!
Every once in a while, we get to really stretch our creativity. A couple of weeks ago, a teacher asked us what to use instead of taffy to demonstrate metamorphic rocks. You should have been listening to the phone conversation between me and Kim. “Well, what exactly will the kids be doing to show metamorphic rock? Are they compressing it under heat? Are they changing its form from granular to crystal? Are they stretching it or folding it? Are they showing layers or texture?” We sounded pretty darn scientific. And we probably over-thought it, by a long shot.
But we came up with a bunch of different ideas for the teacher, from the putty you use to stick posters to the wall, to marshmallows, to slime. It turns out she just wanted the kids to stretch the stuff, so she went with our idea that most resembled her original request of taffy – Airheads candy.
We’re proud to say that in 4 years of school, we’ve yet to be stumped by a teacher’s request. When we can, we try to steer the teachers away from food products at all (instead of piñata candy, I found small toys and some old Mexican coins that the kids loved), just because we want to see less candy in schools as a general rule that has little to do with food allergies and more to do with healthy overall eating habits. But when food is really called for, we can supply that, too.
Sometimes it feels like a hassle, but it’s worth it to keep our kids (and other allergic kids) safe, and worth it to teach the teachers that there really are safe substitutions for all their favorite classroom activities.
And I have to admit, it’s kind of fun to be challenged to think in new ways. There’s something refreshingly creative about spending a few minutes brainstorming crazy ideas about what metamorphic rocks and Airheads have in common.
By the way, here is the recipe for the chocolate bark, from Hershey’s and the Food Allergy & Anaphylaxis Network (FAAN):
Hershey’s Special Dark Bark
Milk-free, Egg-free, Wheat-free, Peanut-free, Soy-free, Nut-free
1 (8-oz.) package of Hershey’s Unsweetened Baking Chocolate, broken into pieces
1/4 cup plus 1 tsp. shortening
1/8 tsp. vanilla extract
2 cups confectioners sugar
Grease 9x9-inch pan. Set aside. In medium bowl, microwave chocolate and shortening on high for 1 1/2 to 2 minutes, until mixture is melted and smooth when stirred. Add vanilla extract. Gradually stir in sugar. If mixture becomes too thick, knead with clean hands. Spread out in prepared pan. Cover tightly. Refrigerate until firm. Break into pieces. Store, well covered, in refrigerator.
Note: After changing the formulation on its Special Dark chocolate bar to include milk, Hershey’s developed this recipe for milk-allergic consumers.
Monday, May 12, 2008
My Recipe in Home & Heart Magazine
Today marks the start of Food Allergy Awareness Week! All across the country, individuals and groups are finding ways to spread the word about the dangers of food allergies.
I’m especially excited this week, because the May issue of the magazine I manage, Home & Heart, goes on sale tomorrow (Tuesday, May 13) at newsstands everywhere. This issue’s theme is “gift-giving throughout the year.” In it, we spotlight gifts you can make and give for all sorts of fun little holidays, from Administrative Professional’s Day, to Chocolate Chip Day, to Talk Like a Pirate Day.
The best part is, I got to include Food Allergy Awareness Week as one of the gift-giving holidays, and I added my own recipe for “Mom’s Best Apple Bread.” It’s free of nuts, eggs, milk, and soy. To make it wheat-free, substitute your favorite flour blend.
So if you’re interested, look for the May issue of Home & Heart beginning tomorrow for lots of great crafty ideas for holidays throughout the year. And just to get you in the mood for Food Allergy Awareness Week, here’s my recipe from page 28. Enjoy!
Mom’s Best Apple Bread
2 c. flour (1 c. whole wheat and 1 c. white)
3/4 c. sugar
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1 1/2 c. applesauce
1 - 1 1/2 c. apple, peeled and finely chopped
1/4 c. oil
1 1/2 tsp. baking powder
1 1/2 Tbsp. white vinegar
1 1/2 Tbsp. apple juice or water
In large bowl, mix together the first six dry ingredients. In a separate bowl, mix the applesauce, chopped apple, and oil. In a large cup, mix together the remaining baking powder, vinegar, and apple juice or water. The mixture will foam rapidly. Pour it immediately into the apple mixture and mix well. Blend wet ingredients into dry ingredients.
Line a loaf pan with parchment paper and spray the paper with cooking oil. Add batter. Bake at 350 degrees for 50 – 55 minutes. Let the bread cool in the pan on a cooling rack for 10 – 15 minutes before removing from the pan. (You can cover the bread with a dish towel to keep it from drying out.)
Tip: For a delicious variation, add 1/2 c. raisins or dried cranberries to the apple mixture.
I’m especially excited this week, because the May issue of the magazine I manage, Home & Heart, goes on sale tomorrow (Tuesday, May 13) at newsstands everywhere. This issue’s theme is “gift-giving throughout the year.” In it, we spotlight gifts you can make and give for all sorts of fun little holidays, from Administrative Professional’s Day, to Chocolate Chip Day, to Talk Like a Pirate Day.
The best part is, I got to include Food Allergy Awareness Week as one of the gift-giving holidays, and I added my own recipe for “Mom’s Best Apple Bread.” It’s free of nuts, eggs, milk, and soy. To make it wheat-free, substitute your favorite flour blend.
So if you’re interested, look for the May issue of Home & Heart beginning tomorrow for lots of great crafty ideas for holidays throughout the year. And just to get you in the mood for Food Allergy Awareness Week, here’s my recipe from page 28. Enjoy!
Mom’s Best Apple Bread
2 c. flour (1 c. whole wheat and 1 c. white)
3/4 c. sugar
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1 1/2 c. applesauce
1 - 1 1/2 c. apple, peeled and finely chopped
1/4 c. oil
1 1/2 tsp. baking powder
1 1/2 Tbsp. white vinegar
1 1/2 Tbsp. apple juice or water
In large bowl, mix together the first six dry ingredients. In a separate bowl, mix the applesauce, chopped apple, and oil. In a large cup, mix together the remaining baking powder, vinegar, and apple juice or water. The mixture will foam rapidly. Pour it immediately into the apple mixture and mix well. Blend wet ingredients into dry ingredients.
Line a loaf pan with parchment paper and spray the paper with cooking oil. Add batter. Bake at 350 degrees for 50 – 55 minutes. Let the bread cool in the pan on a cooling rack for 10 – 15 minutes before removing from the pan. (You can cover the bread with a dish towel to keep it from drying out.)
Tip: For a delicious variation, add 1/2 c. raisins or dried cranberries to the apple mixture.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Snack Bars in Paradise
A friend’s daughter is headed to Africa and Europe in a few weeks, for a summer’s worth of adventure. She’ll be visiting friends and relatives, as well as doing volunteer work while she’s there. She’s about twenty, full of energy and life and enthusiasm and joy.
And she’s allergic to a whole bunch of things. Her mom’s a tad worried.
But the best way to travel safely is to be prepared, so that’s exactly what the girl and her mom are doing. The mom asked me if I’d found any protein or snack bars that were free of nuts, milk, and eggs. I got on the UFAN forum and asked for recommendations, and everyone agreed that the Enjoy Life snack bars are tasty, and they’re free of all 8 of the “Top Ten” allergens. The mom went online that very night and ordered several boxes. (Click here for the Enjoy Life Foods website.)
When you’re traveling – especially in other countries – finding food without your allergens can be tricky. Sometimes you get lucky and find waiters who speak English, foods you trust, and markets that look reputable. Sometimes you don’t. So carrying your own food with you is essential. Even if you end up not needing it, it’s better to have it than wish you did. And it doesn’t really matter if it’s all that yummy or terribly balanced. You just need to survive for a few days or weeks, and you can do that on bottled water and snack bars if you have to. You can always get back onto a healthier diet when you return.
The other thing this mom and daughter are doing is finding translations for “I’m allergic to…” in all the languages where she’ll be traveling (which is a lot!). A great place for preprinted cards that can help you tell waiters what you’re allergic to, or ask someone to get you medical help fast, is www.SelectWisely.com. Their website has all kinds of helpful tips and resources, and preprinted cards in more languages than you can shake an EpiPen at.
Watching this friend of mine plan for her daughter’s vacation, I realize that it doesn’t matter how old and self-sufficient our children get. We will always worry about them and we will always do anything we can to keep them safe – even when they’re all grown up and heading to the other side of the planet.
I ordered some of the Enjoy Life snack bars myself, to let my son try them. He liked them, and took one in his lunchbox to school today. Someday, my son wants to travel to Japan. We travel a lot and have always had good luck wherever we’ve gone, but Japan makes me more nervous because we don’t speak even a jot of Japanese and I know they use a lot of peanut oils and nuts in their cooking. But even so, someday he may get there, and I know I’ll be just like this friend of mine – stocking up on safe snack bars and other suitcase-friendly foods that will turn his vacation from a trip through a land mine into the trip of his dreams.
I’ll have to do it. It’s in the mom handbook. I’ll be standing there in the airport with all the other moms, saying, “Have a nice trip! I love you! Here’s a snack bar!”
And she’s allergic to a whole bunch of things. Her mom’s a tad worried.
But the best way to travel safely is to be prepared, so that’s exactly what the girl and her mom are doing. The mom asked me if I’d found any protein or snack bars that were free of nuts, milk, and eggs. I got on the UFAN forum and asked for recommendations, and everyone agreed that the Enjoy Life snack bars are tasty, and they’re free of all 8 of the “Top Ten” allergens. The mom went online that very night and ordered several boxes. (Click here for the Enjoy Life Foods website.)
When you’re traveling – especially in other countries – finding food without your allergens can be tricky. Sometimes you get lucky and find waiters who speak English, foods you trust, and markets that look reputable. Sometimes you don’t. So carrying your own food with you is essential. Even if you end up not needing it, it’s better to have it than wish you did. And it doesn’t really matter if it’s all that yummy or terribly balanced. You just need to survive for a few days or weeks, and you can do that on bottled water and snack bars if you have to. You can always get back onto a healthier diet when you return.
The other thing this mom and daughter are doing is finding translations for “I’m allergic to…” in all the languages where she’ll be traveling (which is a lot!). A great place for preprinted cards that can help you tell waiters what you’re allergic to, or ask someone to get you medical help fast, is www.SelectWisely.com. Their website has all kinds of helpful tips and resources, and preprinted cards in more languages than you can shake an EpiPen at.
Watching this friend of mine plan for her daughter’s vacation, I realize that it doesn’t matter how old and self-sufficient our children get. We will always worry about them and we will always do anything we can to keep them safe – even when they’re all grown up and heading to the other side of the planet.
I ordered some of the Enjoy Life snack bars myself, to let my son try them. He liked them, and took one in his lunchbox to school today. Someday, my son wants to travel to Japan. We travel a lot and have always had good luck wherever we’ve gone, but Japan makes me more nervous because we don’t speak even a jot of Japanese and I know they use a lot of peanut oils and nuts in their cooking. But even so, someday he may get there, and I know I’ll be just like this friend of mine – stocking up on safe snack bars and other suitcase-friendly foods that will turn his vacation from a trip through a land mine into the trip of his dreams.
I’ll have to do it. It’s in the mom handbook. I’ll be standing there in the airport with all the other moms, saying, “Have a nice trip! I love you! Here’s a snack bar!”
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Flying Peanuts
I was in Arizona this weekend with a couple of girlfriends. We had a blast – we let “spontaneity” be our theme word, so we let our whims guide us and had a great adventure, somehow cramming a little of everything into our trip.
Then, just to keep that “spontaneous” theme going, the airline decided to help by bumping us off our return flight. So instead of returning Sunday night as planned, we returned yesterday. It meant a few fast phone calls to sort out babysitting, lining up people to get our kids ready and off to school without us, and another phone call for a friend to come pick up my two companions at the airport so that I could drive directly to a Monday morning work meeting that I couldn’t miss.
But it all worked out surprisingly well, and we eventually made it home safe, sound, slightly sunburned, and recharged – and a day off-schedule, which explains why my blog is a day late this week. Oh well. Sometimes life just has its own agenda.
Anyway, the flights to and from Phoenix were short, but still long enough for the attendants to bring out beverages and snacks – your choice of crackers, cookies, or peanuts.
I continue to be surprised that airlines still serve peanuts. How can they do it, knowing that 11 million Americans suffer from food allergies, knowing that peanuts cause the most fatal allergic reactions of any foods, and knowing that they are trapping people in a giant flying can far away from medical help?
Sure, people who fly a lot know that they can call the airlines ahead of time and ask for a peanut-free flight. But that doesn’t help eliminate all the ground-in peanut crumbs in the carpet, on the arm rests, on the trays, in the seats, on the lavatory door handles, and everywhere else. And what about people who don’t fly regularly and don’t know they can call and request a peanut-free flight?
Watching them hand out peanuts made me nervous, even though my son wasn’t on the flight with me. It’s funny how sensitized I am to nuts now.
About three weeks ago, a friend of mine flew across country for work. She’s allergic to a few tree nuts, but she doesn’t usually worry about flights because she’s not allergic to peanuts. But on this particular flight, her colleague, who was sitting next to her, ordered a food tray from the attendant. The food tray contained fruit, pecans, cheese and crackers. He ate the fruit and nuts, but offered my friend the cheese and crackers. Not realizing there had been cross-contamination, she had one.
Quickly, she felt her throat closing up, and knew she was reacting. She grabbed some Benadryl and some water, but it continued to get worse. A few minutes later, she found herself waking up in the back of the plane, a doctor’s face bent over her, with a blood pressure cuff on her arm. Luckily, there was a doctor who responded when the attendants had asked passengers “Is there a doctor on the plane?” There was also someone who had an EpiPen, who offered it to the doctor.
They didn’t have to use the EpiPens – the Benadryl began to work, and the doctor was monitoring her blood pressure to make sure she didn’t go anaphylactic.
It’s our worse nightmare – to have an allergic reaction when you’re that far from a hospital. In her case, she was incredibly lucky and just happened to be flying on a flight with both a doctor and another allergic passenger armed with EpiPens. (The fact that there WAS another allergic passenger on the plane with EpiPens shows how prevalent food allergies really are.)
But it made me wonder how often reactions on airplanes happen, and why the attendants who have to deal with it put up with nuts on their flights (the edible kind, not the psycho passenger kind). If I were a flight attendant, I’d speak up and ask that my employer discontinue nuts, just so I’d eliminate a few more chances for things to go wrong on my flights. You can’t eliminate all possibilities of problems, of course, but why not eliminate the obvious and easy ones? In business, that’s called “picking the low-hanging fruit” – taking the obvious steps to increase chances for success.
My friend’s experience may not have taught the airlines anything, but it did remind her that she can’t let her guard down, even for a single snack. And it reminded me that even adults forget to be vigilante, let alone kids, so I have to continue to remind my son to be aware of his environment, not to take anything for granted, and to be responsible for his own life, no matter where we are.
Then, just to keep that “spontaneous” theme going, the airline decided to help by bumping us off our return flight. So instead of returning Sunday night as planned, we returned yesterday. It meant a few fast phone calls to sort out babysitting, lining up people to get our kids ready and off to school without us, and another phone call for a friend to come pick up my two companions at the airport so that I could drive directly to a Monday morning work meeting that I couldn’t miss.
But it all worked out surprisingly well, and we eventually made it home safe, sound, slightly sunburned, and recharged – and a day off-schedule, which explains why my blog is a day late this week. Oh well. Sometimes life just has its own agenda.
Anyway, the flights to and from Phoenix were short, but still long enough for the attendants to bring out beverages and snacks – your choice of crackers, cookies, or peanuts.
I continue to be surprised that airlines still serve peanuts. How can they do it, knowing that 11 million Americans suffer from food allergies, knowing that peanuts cause the most fatal allergic reactions of any foods, and knowing that they are trapping people in a giant flying can far away from medical help?
Sure, people who fly a lot know that they can call the airlines ahead of time and ask for a peanut-free flight. But that doesn’t help eliminate all the ground-in peanut crumbs in the carpet, on the arm rests, on the trays, in the seats, on the lavatory door handles, and everywhere else. And what about people who don’t fly regularly and don’t know they can call and request a peanut-free flight?
Watching them hand out peanuts made me nervous, even though my son wasn’t on the flight with me. It’s funny how sensitized I am to nuts now.
About three weeks ago, a friend of mine flew across country for work. She’s allergic to a few tree nuts, but she doesn’t usually worry about flights because she’s not allergic to peanuts. But on this particular flight, her colleague, who was sitting next to her, ordered a food tray from the attendant. The food tray contained fruit, pecans, cheese and crackers. He ate the fruit and nuts, but offered my friend the cheese and crackers. Not realizing there had been cross-contamination, she had one.
Quickly, she felt her throat closing up, and knew she was reacting. She grabbed some Benadryl and some water, but it continued to get worse. A few minutes later, she found herself waking up in the back of the plane, a doctor’s face bent over her, with a blood pressure cuff on her arm. Luckily, there was a doctor who responded when the attendants had asked passengers “Is there a doctor on the plane?” There was also someone who had an EpiPen, who offered it to the doctor.
They didn’t have to use the EpiPens – the Benadryl began to work, and the doctor was monitoring her blood pressure to make sure she didn’t go anaphylactic.
It’s our worse nightmare – to have an allergic reaction when you’re that far from a hospital. In her case, she was incredibly lucky and just happened to be flying on a flight with both a doctor and another allergic passenger armed with EpiPens. (The fact that there WAS another allergic passenger on the plane with EpiPens shows how prevalent food allergies really are.)
But it made me wonder how often reactions on airplanes happen, and why the attendants who have to deal with it put up with nuts on their flights (the edible kind, not the psycho passenger kind). If I were a flight attendant, I’d speak up and ask that my employer discontinue nuts, just so I’d eliminate a few more chances for things to go wrong on my flights. You can’t eliminate all possibilities of problems, of course, but why not eliminate the obvious and easy ones? In business, that’s called “picking the low-hanging fruit” – taking the obvious steps to increase chances for success.
My friend’s experience may not have taught the airlines anything, but it did remind her that she can’t let her guard down, even for a single snack. And it reminded me that even adults forget to be vigilante, let alone kids, so I have to continue to remind my son to be aware of his environment, not to take anything for granted, and to be responsible for his own life, no matter where we are.
Monday, April 21, 2008
Kindergarten and First Grade Jitters
It’s spring! Yep, it’s that time of year when parents of 5-year-olds are registering their adorable little bundles of curiosity for kindergarten (or their 6-year-olds for first grade). It’s a crazy thought – that little bright-eyed toddler isn’t a toddler any more, and in fact is growing up right before our eyes! Look, there – another inch, another big word, another surprising utterance, another outgrown pair of shoes!
But then we take another look, and they’re still babies. So little, so dependent, so attached to Mommy (we hope), so ill-equipped to go out into that big, bad world. And when our little angels have severe food allergies, we find ourselves worrying even more.
My kindergarten angel is a third grade ruffian now, but kindergarten seems like just a heartbeat ago. I remember how worried I was when I filled out that registration form. What was I thinking, letting my sweet baby go into that wild jungle called “school”?
Well, here we are, wrapping up his fourth year in a public school, and we’ve both survived so far. Whew.
But because I know so many parents are going through those kindergarten and first grade registration jitters right now, I thought I’d offer up a list of suggestions for making the process of starting school a little easier. (For the parents, that is. The kids will have a blast. It’s us old folks that have all the problems.)
1. Volunteer a lot, so the staff knows you and counts on you (not just for allergy issues). If the only time they see you is when there's a food allergy, then you may start feeling like they're whispering "Oh no, here she comes again." But if they see you as a "Gosh, what would we do without her" kind of volunteer, then the occasional food issue will be coming from a great mom who's making a reasonable request.
2. If someone else is already the class mom, or you can't volunteer for that position, tell the teacher you really need to attend all parties and field trips because of the food allergy. The teacher may want to let the other parents know that you'll be selected for all the special events because of the food allergy, so that they don't think the teacher is playing favorites or something.
3. Ask the principal if there are other food allergic kids in the same grade, and if they can be assigned to the same teacher. That makes it easier for the allergic parents to trade off field-trip and party chaperone duties, it puts all the kids in the same class so that the classroom can be more allergen-free, and gives you some backup in food issues. (It's nice to NOT be the only one.) Statistically, about one in twenty kids has a food allergy, so chances are good there will be more kids than just your child.
4. Volunteer to shop for all the snacks or food materials for classroom parties or food educational units (like making noodle necklaces or gingerbread houses, etc.). Tell the teacher if she'll collect money donations, you'll go buy all the ingredients. They're usually delighted to get out of having to shop.
5. Make several copies of your Food Allergy Action Plan (see FAAN’s website here) and ask to hang one in the office, the cafeteria kitchen, and the classroom, so that your child's photo and "What to do in case of a reaction" instructions are handy no matter where he is.
6. Practice with your child what he should do if he "feels funny." Role-play and pretend you're the teacher, and have him come up and tell you what's wrong. Often our kids are too shy about asking for help, so have him practice with you, and with the teacher if possible. Not only does that give your child words to use if something happens, but it helps impress upon the teacher how important it is.
7. I get on my principal's staff meeting agenda at the first of the year and give a 5-minute talk about allergies and demonstrate the EpiPen. I also give a presentation to my son's class, and all the teachers and aides he comes into contact with. If you're not comfortable doing this, ask if there are other allergic parents that you can contact. Talk to them about ways to teach the teachers -- maybe another mom would be willing to give the presentation if you make the photocopies. It's easier when there are two of you involved!
8. Remember, In Utah, your child can legally carry his EpiPen. But he probably can't administer it to himself in an emergency, so make sure the teachers and everyone else know where it is and how to use it. My son carries his in his backpack so that it's always in the classroom, and I also fill a second prescription and they keep it in the office. So he has two sets at school.
9. If he's going to be having lunch at school, talk to the Lunch Lady and cafeteria monitor. Introduce your child, tell her what your child is allergic to, and let your child know that the Lunch Lady is a friend that will help keep him safe. Then remember the Lunch Lady and the cafeteria monitor on holidays with little thank you cards or gifts to show you appreciate them. Few people do that. But it will help keep your child's food issues fresh in their mind, and they'll get to know him well.
10. Ask about setting up a food table just for allergic kids. All that’s required is a table with a sign that says allergies only, and the cafeteria monitors clean it with a separate marked bucket and cloth. Don’t let them make your child eat in a separate room or the principal’s office. He shouldn’t be punished just because he’s allergic to some foods! Ask the principal to mention the allergy table in a newsletter or other information that goes home with kids at the beginning of the year. You may find other kids with allergies expressing an interest in sitting at the table if they know it’s available.
11. Ask the parents of your child’s friends to send safe lunches with them every once in a while, so they can eat with your child. Make it a fun place to be!
12. Most peanut-allergic kids don’t react to the smell of peanut butter in the air, but a few do. If you are worried if your child will react to the air in the cafeteria, ask to take him in for a “practice run” right now. Sit in the cafeteria for half an hour and see if he reacts. If he doesn’t, cross that worry off your list.
13. Eat lunch with him for the first few days. That will reassure both of you that you can both handle this!
14. Talk to the teacher about which cafeteria door your child should use to avoid peanut butter contact (usually the one furthest from the playground), where to put his lunch bag after lunch, and where his EpiPens will be.
15. Remind your child NOT to throw away his lunch trash. Tell him to bring it home in his lunch bag, so that he can avoid using the trash can. If another kid slam-dunks a half-full milk carton in the trash can, you don’t want your milk-allergic child to get splashed.
16. Be aware and be prepared, but don't panic! Kindergarten is going to be a lot of fun, and your child will do just fine. And believe it or not, so will you!
But then we take another look, and they’re still babies. So little, so dependent, so attached to Mommy (we hope), so ill-equipped to go out into that big, bad world. And when our little angels have severe food allergies, we find ourselves worrying even more.
My kindergarten angel is a third grade ruffian now, but kindergarten seems like just a heartbeat ago. I remember how worried I was when I filled out that registration form. What was I thinking, letting my sweet baby go into that wild jungle called “school”?
Well, here we are, wrapping up his fourth year in a public school, and we’ve both survived so far. Whew.
But because I know so many parents are going through those kindergarten and first grade registration jitters right now, I thought I’d offer up a list of suggestions for making the process of starting school a little easier. (For the parents, that is. The kids will have a blast. It’s us old folks that have all the problems.)
1. Volunteer a lot, so the staff knows you and counts on you (not just for allergy issues). If the only time they see you is when there's a food allergy, then you may start feeling like they're whispering "Oh no, here she comes again." But if they see you as a "Gosh, what would we do without her" kind of volunteer, then the occasional food issue will be coming from a great mom who's making a reasonable request.
2. If someone else is already the class mom, or you can't volunteer for that position, tell the teacher you really need to attend all parties and field trips because of the food allergy. The teacher may want to let the other parents know that you'll be selected for all the special events because of the food allergy, so that they don't think the teacher is playing favorites or something.
3. Ask the principal if there are other food allergic kids in the same grade, and if they can be assigned to the same teacher. That makes it easier for the allergic parents to trade off field-trip and party chaperone duties, it puts all the kids in the same class so that the classroom can be more allergen-free, and gives you some backup in food issues. (It's nice to NOT be the only one.) Statistically, about one in twenty kids has a food allergy, so chances are good there will be more kids than just your child.
4. Volunteer to shop for all the snacks or food materials for classroom parties or food educational units (like making noodle necklaces or gingerbread houses, etc.). Tell the teacher if she'll collect money donations, you'll go buy all the ingredients. They're usually delighted to get out of having to shop.
5. Make several copies of your Food Allergy Action Plan (see FAAN’s website here) and ask to hang one in the office, the cafeteria kitchen, and the classroom, so that your child's photo and "What to do in case of a reaction" instructions are handy no matter where he is.
6. Practice with your child what he should do if he "feels funny." Role-play and pretend you're the teacher, and have him come up and tell you what's wrong. Often our kids are too shy about asking for help, so have him practice with you, and with the teacher if possible. Not only does that give your child words to use if something happens, but it helps impress upon the teacher how important it is.
7. I get on my principal's staff meeting agenda at the first of the year and give a 5-minute talk about allergies and demonstrate the EpiPen. I also give a presentation to my son's class, and all the teachers and aides he comes into contact with. If you're not comfortable doing this, ask if there are other allergic parents that you can contact. Talk to them about ways to teach the teachers -- maybe another mom would be willing to give the presentation if you make the photocopies. It's easier when there are two of you involved!
8. Remember, In Utah, your child can legally carry his EpiPen. But he probably can't administer it to himself in an emergency, so make sure the teachers and everyone else know where it is and how to use it. My son carries his in his backpack so that it's always in the classroom, and I also fill a second prescription and they keep it in the office. So he has two sets at school.
9. If he's going to be having lunch at school, talk to the Lunch Lady and cafeteria monitor. Introduce your child, tell her what your child is allergic to, and let your child know that the Lunch Lady is a friend that will help keep him safe. Then remember the Lunch Lady and the cafeteria monitor on holidays with little thank you cards or gifts to show you appreciate them. Few people do that. But it will help keep your child's food issues fresh in their mind, and they'll get to know him well.
10. Ask about setting up a food table just for allergic kids. All that’s required is a table with a sign that says allergies only, and the cafeteria monitors clean it with a separate marked bucket and cloth. Don’t let them make your child eat in a separate room or the principal’s office. He shouldn’t be punished just because he’s allergic to some foods! Ask the principal to mention the allergy table in a newsletter or other information that goes home with kids at the beginning of the year. You may find other kids with allergies expressing an interest in sitting at the table if they know it’s available.
11. Ask the parents of your child’s friends to send safe lunches with them every once in a while, so they can eat with your child. Make it a fun place to be!
12. Most peanut-allergic kids don’t react to the smell of peanut butter in the air, but a few do. If you are worried if your child will react to the air in the cafeteria, ask to take him in for a “practice run” right now. Sit in the cafeteria for half an hour and see if he reacts. If he doesn’t, cross that worry off your list.
13. Eat lunch with him for the first few days. That will reassure both of you that you can both handle this!
14. Talk to the teacher about which cafeteria door your child should use to avoid peanut butter contact (usually the one furthest from the playground), where to put his lunch bag after lunch, and where his EpiPens will be.
15. Remind your child NOT to throw away his lunch trash. Tell him to bring it home in his lunch bag, so that he can avoid using the trash can. If another kid slam-dunks a half-full milk carton in the trash can, you don’t want your milk-allergic child to get splashed.
16. Be aware and be prepared, but don't panic! Kindergarten is going to be a lot of fun, and your child will do just fine. And believe it or not, so will you!
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